Those of you who possess more computing power than say, a sponge, know that it is a spectacularly bad idea to trawl your new love’s history of the heart. You may have heard the brutal truth but actually seeing it is about on the same level of fun as playing barefoot bowls on a field of shattered window panes while taking big gulps of mustard gas.

Why do we do it though? Are we such masochists? You know it will tear rents in your soul yet you hungrily read the next bit of text, you hunt for words of love or betrayal and when you find them you experience a moment of tainted pleasure. Please sir, may I have some more blood filled porridge?*

Oh and things are going just spectacularly well with Himself‘s roommate. Understandable or not, he is throwing a brokenhearted, lonely, angry, destructive, self pitying tantrum that would do a 2 year old proud. The problem came in when I, who have known him for only a few weeks, told him pretty much verbatim, all of that. I may be right but saying so was also a VERY BAD IDEA. I’m also the cause of the roommate’s only friend (pretty much) never being home. Anyone want to take a guess who gets the Evil Bitch of the Year award?

On the upside: D’s dad was not only civil with me today but actually said, and I hope you are sitting down for this, “thank you”. May it be that the past year of tense, barely restrained bitterness is coming to an end?

*The Last Emperor- the only scene in that movie to have ever stuck with me. Innocuous white porridge with blood welling through the broken crust.

How do people get anything done during summer? Even worse, when in love, during summer? I have a choice: I can take whatever responsible braincells* I have left and do my job or I can write here. Guess which has been winning?

Then there is the whole writing when sickeningly happy  thing. MM and I discussed it earlier. I think there is something fundamentally bent** about writers. How is dipping your fingers in the black tar of hurt and fingerpainting words on any available surface not a little abnormal?

I think a wordsmith is one who can harvest that intensity and refine it, stopper it in an inkwell and later use a fine nib to write every day. I know that I don’t have that kind of talent/drive, so when I am as rib-huggingly happy, the last thing I want to do is trawl a dank basement stocked with jars of fermenting gall in order to scribble a quick ygm.

I wish I could go book shopping. Please note that I would rather dress in rags and have my hair done annually than go without visiting Tall Stories. I miss reading books. I’ve been so busy with work research, and Ye Olde Social Life, that caressing a pulpy spine is a guilty, very intermittent, occurrence. Oh and my car is proving to be a tad expensive. Lovely old dame that she may be.

1. Word of the day: peripatetic (The Sage: 1. traveling especially on foot 2. of or relating to Aristotle or his philosophy). I wonder how that one word came to mean such different things but I can see how it would make sense. Teachers way back when tended to travel a lot.

2. Insight of the day: Apparently nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. I wish I could wholeheartedly believe/embrace this because for me, as good as being thin feels, how can it be better than a spicy breyani which tastes of cream and earth? Or cocoa powdery mint ice cream freezing your mouth when sweat runs down your spine? That said, I need to start working out. The consequences of happiness of the mouth is not fun :/

3. State of the pool: stir me with a wooden spoon and whistle your favourite 70′s melodic rock tune :)

4. Joys of the day: 1. Talking with friends, MM and WaWa this morning and receiving counsel of both the sublime and the practical, 2. putting my chin on my hand and feeling the breeze on my face while daydreaming of Him, 3. kissing D‘s still baby chubby cheek and feeling him squirm but then relent and throw little arms around my neck.

5. Awesomest lines: Billie Holiday – Fine & Mellow

6. Scripture lines: Philipians 2 (NIV)

¹If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ²then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. ³Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. ⁴Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

*Even the laziest of us have a few of these category 2, leadership jacket wearing, clipboard holding, shiny shoe, side parted bryl creemed cells primly bossing the rest of the braincells around. I think any folk who willingly join home owner’s associations or who go to local municipal meetings have rather a lot of these cells…

**The Afrikaans word “geknak” does it better justice.

As you know: I love what I do and the company that allows me to do so. However, currently thinking of my future  makes me feel like my ribs are being rythmically and methodically pounded by a few million nanotech hammers. Every day I have less breathing space and this is not because my Wonderbra has decided to go Austen on me and has surreptiously turned into a full-bring-on-the-smelling-salts-corset*.

No, it is because I’m neither an employee nor an owner. The 3 non members have almost all the responsibility and stress of keeping the company afloat and almost none of the traditional perks of being an employee. Now this is incredibly freeing but it inevitably leads to wanting a slice of the awesome you help to create.

I wish they would make up their minds already. All we can do is ask. If it is no then so be it, but these endless meetings where we are ever more like whiny girlfriends begging for a wedding date is starting to get old. Please note that it is hardly fun for the members, the difference is that they are holding the ring. Having power you see, is a like a owning a panther with a bladder infection.

To continue with the blendy metaphors: Why marry someone if you don’t know if they are (lookit mom, restraint) good cooks and why whip up that 7 layered hazelnut parfait if they are not willing to marry you?***

On the other hand maybe I am just not seeing it. Maybe I am so blinded by the thought of being equal and really heard that I am missing something. Maybe I am made to be an employee, someone to be herded and shaved to the bone every now and again.

Spoke the Him last night about where we see our careers are going and I know exactly what I want to do. I want a few programmers like The Architect**, Boaz and Poet Programmer as well as a delightful venture capitalist with an avuncular interest in innovation & automation to mentor and fund us for a few months.

One tiny problem with this. Well, 2. #1: What about my current company? and #2: how will my brand new sticky pink lurve survive 72 x (14h x 365d)? The answer for both is not looking rosy folks. Actually it looks decidedly on the dried blood side of pink.

I really don’t  know how to go forward. I’ve had a crap load of deals collapse on me this year, mostly due to my not knowing enough in order to save it. In my defense I’d only been busy with this new career since January, which I have to shamefacedly admit is hardly a saving grace, and I did not receive support or training but that isn’t really an excuse either. I could have done more and now I have to eat my eggless omelet while waving at the basket which contained said yolky joy. So I can understand the reluctance to let me in kitchen to play at parfait. HOWEVER, I also know that I am bloody talented. And no one is more surprised at this than your author. It rocks finding something that you can really do and do well.

/SIGH

1. Word of the day: equal (The Sage: 1. having the requisite qualities or resources to meet a task, 2. having the same quantity, measure or value as another)

2. Insight of the day: I need a real holiday. I am tired and it’s not just from the perpetual lack of sleep :/

3. State of the pool: Troubled but clear

4. Joys of the day: 1. Rediscovering a playlist that I listened to exactly this time last year and being able to contrast one year with another, 2. Dreaming of waking up between Him and D, 3. flexitime which allows me to finish this blog and spend some real time with my son and finish my work tonight :)

5. Awesomest lines: Elsa Volschenk: so vind jy my

ek is nie opsoek na jou gretige belangstelling in my doen en late,
jou sout-van-die-aarde sjarme wat my jou ego gaan laat vaar tot ‘n mate nie

ek is nie opsoek na jou stukkie insig wat jy dink my gaan stimuleer
of jou diepste seer om my siels-empatie mee te infiltreer nie

ek is ook nie opsoek na jou prentjie droom wat jy hoop ons eendag sal wees nie

ek is eintlik net hier
vir jou

sonder al die dinge wat jy glo my gaan laat aanhou soek
vir daardie iemand

wat jy nie is nie

6. Scripture line: Ephesians 4 (NIV)

¹As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. ²Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. ³Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. ⁴There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called— ⁵one Lord, one faith, one baptism; ⁶one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

*I swear it. It looks exactly like it used to but the wire seems to be boring into my ribs. Who needs a tracheotomy when you can just poke holes in your lungs with underwire…rattling breath death by a housekeeper with an agenda. Perhaps I should explain to her that D’s inheritance is not yet all that and machine washing underwear is not the most effective tool for instant wealth. Oh wow. She might have to wait longer than I thought. I don’t have a will…this is not good.

**Incredibly talented programmer that I worked with seamlessly and that was before I realised I can do what I now know I can.

***I.e. Why should they give us ownership if we haven’t “performed” and why should we “perform” if we don’t have ownership?

I am droolingly stupid and horrified. I just spent the past 2 hours watching DSTV and I am shaking and depressed. How can anyone watch television and not want to kill themselves? Not kidding. Not being overly dramatic…well.

No wonder our world is in the wtf state it is in. Good lord folks…Read. Please read? Hell, I will even be ok with you reading Die Son or Heat* or even Huisgenoot**.

Do NOT watch MTV’s The City. I watched about 7 minutes of beautiful people being extremely nasty to each other in P Diddy party look alike places. I kept glancing around me in the typical ass-porn watchers’ stance of please-dear-lord-let-no-one-I-know-catch-me-watching-this-filth. If that is not scripted I am a giant zucchini wearing a bowler hat.

And then I thought to turn to good ol’ sitcoms…Noooooooooo. Either tv became suicide-with-wet-meat-bad or the past year has rid me of the wish to turn my kingdom/mind into a stupid free zone (mostly). Even National Geographic*** had some insipid take on Nosferatu on. Nuh UH.

Anyway. Rant over. Now on to something restoring like Punch Drunk Love. Luckily pseudo intellectuals like moi can turn to Adam Sandler**** for sanity restoring entertainment.

* Sunstroke anyone? I am not going to develop this further because I am still reeling with the shock of nearly stabbing myself in the eyeballs with a salad fork in desperation. I’ve never wanted to be blinded and deaf so much in my life. And this includes the time I walked in on someone’s parents’ scenario which involved pleather and baby oil.

**/SHUDDER

*** Every geek’s safe house tv wise

****Laugh now. Think you get the irony. Then watch this movie or Reign over me. Yeah. We’ll talk while you weep with how good The Water Boy can be. Soul, go to your home.

I am watching Boer Soek ‘n Vrou and deary me, chewing foil would be more fun. The “probing” questions, the evasive Afrikaans farmer mustachioed, plaid shirt wearing, chino wielding bore meisters makes me seriously consider whacking my extremities on gangrene causing rusted ogiesdraad. /shudder

I’ve been trying to write to, and about, Him but I can’t find the words. I can’t even explain why I love him to Him. How do you write about something that is so good? Being with him is golden. I am at peace when he is around. But not the monkish-on-a-mountain-top-meditation kind of peace…the light becomes honey, my soul is lifted and my heart swirls adrenaline through all of me. To me, He is coming home. He is life, and joy and knowing that I want to be around Him and hear what he has to say every moment of the day. He is beautiful and kind. That feral, sweet smile breaks me every time. Which pretty much means your author is shattered Lego so often that should you be unfortunate enough to be around blocky bits of gory moi, you would be stumbling and muttering foul curses while clutching your (my or your blood?) sticky red toes.

I am happy :)…sickeningly so.

1. Word of the day:  substantive (The Sage: 3. being on topic and prompting thought)

2. Insight of the day: For the foreseeable future I am not cut out for management. I’ve lost my carefully cultivated corporate cool and will have to rebuild it before I can run our company.

3. State of the pool: Clear anise flavoured liquor headily swishing.

4. Joys of the day: 1. Concentrating because I feel the summer breeze and sunlight warms me. 2. Having D smile at me and imperiously and with a little tongue not yet used to hard consonants,  demand a sandwich.

5. Awesomest lines: Thank you MM. Pablo Neruda…get used to this. He will be featuring quite a lot :)

“I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair.
Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.
Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day
I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps.

I hunger for your sleek laugh,
your hands the color of a savage harvest,
hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails,
I want to eat your skin like a whole almond.

I want to eat the sunbeam flaring in your lovely body,
the sovereign nose of your arrogant face,
I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes,

and I pace around hungry, sniffing the twilight,
hunting for you, for your hot heart,
Like a puma in the barrens of Quitratue.”

6. Scripture line: Ephesians 3 – New International Version. Mind blowing stuff!

¹⁴For this reason I kneel before the Father, ¹⁵from whom his whole family^[a] in heaven and on earth derives its name. ¹⁶I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, ¹⁷so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, ¹⁸may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, ¹⁹and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Just a quick note as I am swamped with overdue work. Writing keywords for a financial site is not as fascinating as you might think and therefore long avoided.

Being a woman, on the whole, is a great experience*. However, every now and again we get these days of morbid, warped self image where nothing about ponderous ankles are ok. Or where your fat skirt fits…/shudder.

Where all you want to do is wear holey sweatpants, glasses, tie your hair in a conditioner soaked knot** and read blanky books about people with swords and names like Aethor the Dark Elf. Oh and most importantly HIDE while wolfing down KFC and guzzling a litre or so of Chardonnay and contemplate liposuction with a cooldrink straw and an industrial vacuum cleaner. ***

If you were wondering, guys, what you can do about this: Nothing, really. He told me this morning how lovely he thinks I am and all I could think was how on earth I was going to suck in my continental gut so that he still likes me and does not send me to Fat Camp with the other butterballs.

/pat pat to all of you with girlfriends. Women are strange, strange creatures who will not believe you if you tell them you think they are beautiful just they way they are, but magnify the hell out of a sideways comment on another woman’s walk.

1. Word of the day: myocardial infarction (a heart attack). Dunno why it is stuck in my mind but I’ve been muttering it all day.

2. Insight of the day:  CC is leaving on Friday and that makes my shoulders slump so low that I can tickle my own feet without bending.

3. State of the pool: wobbly lime jelly

4. Joys of the day: 1. inching along Olifantsfontein and watching a lady snapping her fingers and jamming to what must have been an awesome album, 2. waking up to the knowledge that I will see His beautiful smile every day for the next week. 3. Trading witty banter with Krugaza-san

5. Awesomest lines: Jou skitterappel – Elsa Volschenk

ons is vallende sterre
wat soos lucifers
tussen aardse molekules
flikker omdat
swaartekrag ons
realiteit verwesenlik

maar vergewe my wat
as ‘n eva-appel
hoort aan my eie
Newtonboom
en nie weet van
vrye
val
nie

6. Scripture line: Philippians 1:9-10

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ,”

*Not that I could compare but brief flights of fancy of wielding my own “sword” have convinced me of this.

**This is a scary thing to behold btw. You could use said knot to oil the dining room table.

***Which ironically, makes you feel infinitely worse about yourself and is on par with self flagellation. You then consider going the bulimic route but dismiss it as that would be admitting you binged. SIGH.

This is just yours truly rambling because it is far too beautiful a day for work (that I have quite a lot of but am rebelling). I’m sitting next to an open window and the sunlight is inching onto my lily white self and fanning the tendrils of hair that escaped from the far-too-lazy-to-comb-let’s-make-a-sloppy-ponytail-instead hairdo.

I have the attention span of an ADHD gnat on smack. All I want to do is revel. I want to take big gulps of love/air, I want to be swollen with joy and beauty. I want to forget about anything but having my fingers swim through the air, away from here. I want to feel the heat and sweat of justice and to have those cells happily bounce because there is no moment better than this. No regrets of yesterday, no what ifs of tomorrow. Just maple syrup sunlight, top lip beads of sweat, braai smoke and chilled wine under The Wisteria Purple Patio.

I want to be moved by incendiary guitarists like Jimi & John Mayer (but of course). I want to feel CC‘s (Felix Laband Whistling in tongues,  Juno Reactor Conquistador Part 1) music goosebump my entire being. I want the notes of Hans Zimmer’s Elysium and Now we are free to soak into my muscle filaments and untangle the mess of too much Dell 610.

I want witty banter and lazy sauntering. I want to walk arm in arm and plait honeysuckle into my hair. I want to laugh so hard I crack a rib. I want to trace the skin of your wrist and watch you shudder with pleasure. I want to lie on the trampoline and feel half of me bake. I want to hear MM beautiful belly laugh and Rambo‘s deep voice caressing terse sentences. I want to say goodbye to my friend who is not even going all that far and see the bittersweet joy this will have him feel. I want to never forget this day or this weekend or this frame of my life.

I love my life, as you should yours.

1. Word of the frame: reverberate (The Sage: 5. ring or echo with sound, 6. have a long or continuing effect)

2. Insight of the frame: Being able to express exactly how you are feeling is like a first kiss.

3. State of the pool: gin and tonic

4. Joy of the frame: I will probably get all I want /grin

5. Awesomest lines: I freaking adore this woman. Yours and mine – Elsa Volschenk

My heart is humming to it
my mind dancing to it
my dreams chasing it

Your heart is closed to it
your mind unaware of it
your dreams untouched by it

Our worlds collide into it
but it’s different -
while bursting in my soul
it’s resting in yours.

Sorry about the radio silence folks but I am 1. as previously mentioned in this post, the village idiot and 2. sans 3G which makes posting outside of the comfort and joy of the work place challenging. And be warned: the likelihood of this post being south of anything resembling erudition is very good*!

I’m addicted to Him. If I could mainline him I would. We were sitting in Brooklyn @ Col’Cacchio which has paper table coverings** so I started writing to him. The handwritten, public note ended with me saying that I wanted to swim in his blood…that gave me pause. But only a brief pause. Angie might have had a point with the whole vial of blood thing.

MM wanted to know why I was so quiet about Him and I really had to think about it. The intensity of this tangled new love is melting my stone soul and I am left exposed and pink skinned. Wouldn’t you protect something so valuable with the best of you? I want to wrap my words around this tiny shiny globe, shield it from the world, softly softly cup it in my hands and show only those who would not harm it, who would delight as I do, in the flutters of joy. I shout my love from the mountains*** and drag poor Him to any and every gathering of my heartfriends. Oh please, y’all know by now that my social butterfly would not retreat for mere love.

However, I know that new love is like a snakebite. If you are a snake the bite is on the feather side of kinky but if you are anyone else you’ll soon start vomiting and wishing for death so I will stop prattling on about it.

CC is leaving in less than a week. I have no idea how I am going to handle this town without him. It helps that I can wrap infatuation around me like a assassin’s cowl but at some point I will have to face that my person is leaving….just writing this has me bawling so Saturday’s party at the Hungarian Bar should be a snot fest. Luckily I have long since developed a taste for salty-bitter-tear-flavoured syrupy vodka. Anyway.

I have two brothers, Little Brother the rock star you’ve read about, and now I introduce you to Beautiful Brother. He is, well, incredibly pretty. He just came back from the UK where he found God and purpose. He has been a chef in the SA Navy, a chef on a few game farms, a hair dresser and most recently a handy man. No. He is not gay nor will he be an Indian next. He’s decided to be an electrician.

Please understand that he is pretty enough to make most women walk into solid things so he will either do really, really well as suburban housewives will have quite a bit of explaining to do to husbands about the sudden jump in household maintenance bills or he will never be hired because we are used to Butt Crack Sparky fixing the lights. I’m glad he is back though :)

1. Word of the day: pertinacity (The Sage: 1. persistent determination)

2. Insight of the day: The first summer shower washes the world awake.

3. State of the pool:  gritty but ice cold india ink

4. Joys of the day: 1. Sitting next to an open window showing me the washed world, 2. Knowing that I get to see Him every day for the next 4 whole days, 3. Drinks with Tall Stories folk, CC and Him tomorrow where we’ll dissect (pun totally intended) District 9

5. Awesomest lines: No lines. I’ve been reading fantasy. Vast Touched.

6. Scripture lines: Romans 5 (New International Version)

⁶You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. ⁷Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. ⁸But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

*It is a very obscure reference but I love the way he says this phrase when The Bride pretends to be anything but a revenge queen who speaks fluent bubblegum Los Angeles accented Japanese.

**AWESOME idea. Excellent pizza too.

***Facebook…mountains…same thing really /grin

• @TallStoriesBook It is only because your bookstore is the best in SA :) in reply to TallStoriesBook #
• PTY LTD FTW! #
• @Pieterkrige Hello love :) Welcome to Twitter #
• …If all else fails and you no longer know who you are, I think Dian might be able to tell you http://dianjoubert.com/ #
• @johanmeiring "Frozen din dins are awesome". You are so ready for marriage #
• Is now a rugby fan. Yes, I know /grin. Going to get little girly rugby shirts and everything #
• I think I like http://bit.ly/hMXzz #
• And it runs on Android #
• @johanmeiring same here but what do you think about the Motorola? in reply to johanmeiring #
• [Blog]: What is an e-suburb and why should you implement it: An e-suburb can be thought of as .. http://bit.ly/jijUi
  #spiraleye #
• @johanmeiring oooooh I like the blog thingymajigs #
• Wow. Seacom (http://www.seacomblog.com/) has been up for a month…anyone see a difference yet? #
• Oh Google you utter darling! Writing proposals (butter) + Internet Stats (sizzling scalpel) = *contented sigh* #
• http://www.google.co.uk/intl/en/landing/internetstats/ #
• I love WordPress 3.5. Widgets are so lovely #
• @TallStoriesBook thought you might find this interesting http://tinyurl.com/klrmqj #
• The Bank bought The Fish! YAY!! #
• Just made her first rugby comment. Give me time folks. Soon I will be on Boots&All #
• @johanmeiring /pat pat in reply to johanmeiring #
• I think there might be a law against how utterly in love I am. #
• @johanmeiring bwhahaha..good point in reply to johanmeiring #
• is feeling quite bereft without @TallStoriesBook updates. Wherefore art thou? #
• RT: @TallStoriesBook: Book dealers…have varied interests. Here is an article on synaesthesia 'Can you see time?' http://bit.ly/kYTjS in reply to TallStoriesBook #
• @omekron only you would have "an emergency bag of peanuts" with you. in reply to omekron #
• Gets to write the whole day today *blissful sigh*. Although the accompanying carbs are not so good :/ #
• Summertime Billy Holiday /grin http://bit.ly/weMli #
• sigh Billie not Billy #
• @timothysolomon I understand that you think Drupal is better than WordPress but at least with WordPress I don't have to wade through code :/ #
• YGM = updated #
• [Blog]: Stages of web presence:
  A website is a website is a website right? In one word? NO. N.. http://bit.ly/KRvlS
  #spiraleye #
• May you all have light blue U2 Beautiful Day :) #
• @johanmeiring I object to that. I am perhaps gothic coloured and occasionally mutter curses and cackle but that does not make me a witch in reply to johanmeiring #
• @johanmeiring LOL blommie #
• Tweeting is like composing haiku #
• @omekron /APPLAUSE #
• Remember Andre Schwartz? Not only is he still alive he is still performing. Talk about a trip down memory lane #
• Oh. My. Soul. SA Poledancing Championships…words fail me #
• I don't normally like either talent shows or ventriloquism but holy crap this is impressive http://tinyurl.com/n3m67z #

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I feel like I am motes of once-known-as-Feylian swirling in Barenjaeger* or a leaf blowing in the whistle of Felix Laband’s Whistling in Tongues. I want to drink Him and I know he will taste of maple syrup. My blood is hardly salty red – I’ve just made him a mixed cd of music so saccharine that CC would keel over and die of mortification and soundslut revolt if he ever heard it.

He is…more than I ever thought. He is breath and joy and fear of loss.

Anyway.

Things are going remarkably well at work. I love what I do and these days it consists or ever more writing which kicks ass. Living in Midrand is fantastic. WaWa and Manly Man are complete sweethearts and D has fallen in love (as is his wont) with Violet, the housekeeper****.

This past weekend was blearily wonderful. We went to MM & The Original Camel Man’s place where we listened to Chris Chameleon and drank whisky. Saturday we went to Rambo‘s house where I watched my first voluntary rugby game. I will now shell out actual cash money to buy girl rugby shirts. CC joined us later which resulted in only getting to bed in the bird chittering hours of Sunday morning.

And yes. CC is still leaving but I’m not talking about it as it is imminent enough to make my brown eyes brim. So denial ftw.

1. Word of the day:  treacle (TheSage: 1. writing or music that is excessively sweet and sentimental, 2. a pale cane syrup)

2. Insight of the day: You know in the fabric of your soul when it is the right person. I’d always wondered about that.

3. State of the pool:  Pale gold, body temp honey with splashing tongues of fire.*

4. Joys of the day:  1. Summertime by Billie Holiday, 2. being barefoot and alone at the office, 3. virtual lilo-ing instead of surfing the internet**, 4. wearing and discarding words like putting an outfit together with hours still before the party starts***.

5. Awesomest lines: One of my favourite poems of all time and now, finally, appropriate.

i like my body when it is with your – ee cummings

i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body. i like what it does,
i like its hows. i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones, and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the, shocking fuzz
of your electric furr, and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,

and possibly i like the thrill

of under me you so quite new

6. Scripture line: Song of Solomon (New International Version) 1: ….4

Friends

We rejoice and delight in you ^[b] ;
we will praise your love more than wine.

**Frost sent me this link. Awesome stuff. Why surf if you can fly?

***Reminds me of the afternoon scene in Atonement where Keira Knightly smokes a lot (beautifully though)

****So young and yet already destined to be an Austen character.