Oh wow. There is in me so much lightness that I’m practically the Hindenberg…obviously without the horrible crashing and dying bit.

Have you any idea what it feels like to have a weight so heavy that it would dent your marrow and press into you spirit, be lifted? Of all the wasted years and the hurt I was so sure I had inflicted, this was the worst and now it is gone.

GONE. Oh sure there is still bittersweet regret but that is nothing compared to the soul shucking horror that was that little room in my head. I’ve lived with this for 9 years and now I find out that the poor lovely idiot not only doesn’t blame me but actually thinks it is his fault…

I feel like sobbing with gratitude. Thank you Lord. There is nothing to this but grace.

Now I am free. And I don’t mind turning 30 at all. Bring it on.

*The Lemmings – Man I loved that band. Poor scientologists or not their music made Sunday evenings at Bulldogs otherworldly. Back in the day every one of them looked like LOTR elves.

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This entry was posted on Monday, June 22nd, 2009 at 11:38 pm and is filed under Darkntwisty. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.